Monday 22 March 2021

THN's Top 20 Films: As Of 2021

Thought i'd do a little bit of a top 20 films that I've liked over the past few years, I find every year that my tastes change so this list is NEVER 'definitive' of how i'm feeling from day to day, or even year to year.

Some of these may well surprise you and in the future I think I might break down my list into something more of a top 10 favourite films of a decade even. That would allow me some more interesting inputs as each decade certainly has it's own styles and story telling. You'll also notice that in some cases I like a movie not for what you'd expect, like the story or acting etc, sometimes it'll be how it effected me or introduced me to something else!

But for now lets see where my tastes take me for 2021, There won't be spoilers, well shouldn't be many at least just a brief description of the movie and why I like it.

in at number 20:

20: Happy Death Day 2017
Oh it's just groundhog day with a horror slasher, well yeah duh!
it's a film that takes 2 ideas, a slasher and reliving the same day over and over and smashes them together into a (relatively) new thing. I applaud them for trying to make some new and unique with a tired old genre. IT is still just a slasher at heart with a masked killer which is why it's at 20.

19: Demons/Demoni 1987
The first film that I ever watched that properly made me shit my pants and have nightmares (even to this day, though nightmares now are pretty much indistinguishable from dreams lol). Directed and produced by both Lamberto bava and Dario Argento it was no surprise. Demons is a psuedo zombie flick where if you even get a fleck of demon juice on you you turn into one. Unfortunately it doesn't hold up to well these days, some of the effects are still decent looking but the acting and aging has not stood the test of time.

18: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 1974
Why so low?
I'm just not a fan of Hillbilly murder films, I find a group of inbred (usually they are 90% of the time) yokels just not that scary for some reason. Especially since the protagonists in these films seem to make a lot of silly decisions that get them into this situation.
Now Leatherface though, he is a brilliant character that really brings this series/franchise into my area of likes. I do like a good unstoppable masked nutter and I do love chainsaws too.

17: Re-animator 1985
My introduction to two of the most brilliant people in horror movie history, Barbara Crampton and Jeffery Combs. Also to Brian Yuzna who has a distinct style that I grew to love over the years. this really got into watching From Beyond and really into lovecraftian and eldritch horrors.
The movie itself is a trip into lovecraft territory with all the experimental oddities you could expect from a serum that brings back everything from full humans to fingers and eyes as undead killers.

16: Hellraiser 1987
My introduction to the world of Clive Barker and possibly, to me at least, one of the best adaptations of his books, even if I don't think he liked it a lot. In the short story/novella Pin head isn't even a major player. But it's what this film does right that makes it stand out.
It is once again a window into time and you can clearly see it's age, so in that respect it hasn't aged well time wise. But the visceral effects all of which were practical were and still are very believable of someone returning from the dead like that.
Also it's the start of a franchise that got more and more convoluted and worse as it went on, but I am a sucker for franchises as you all know.

15: Zombie flesh Eaters or Zombi 2 1979
This was another one like demons/demoni I watched relatively young and got quite scared at, one of the most realistic zombie take over movies I think i've ever seen, even more effective than dawn of the dead (more that one later). Rewatching as an older kid had me still a little freaked but also more in awe of two of the best scenes in zombie movie history.
The shark vs zombie fight, which was actually as real as they could make it and the most infamous scene in this and any other zombie movies the wood splinter in the eye scene. 

14: Bad Taste 1987
Peter Jacksons first movie and my first forray into low budget films and how good they can be with a little help from friends and clever use of the budget you have. This film has buckets of blood and viscera mixed with one of the most bizarre story lines, with aliens (full on alien costumes too on the budget) taking over a small New Zealand village intent on using humans as a food source. It soon soars out of control as one of the team get his head cracked open, loses some of his brains and fills the gap with alien brains. I am NOT making this up.
Derrick then goes on an alien killing spree with a chainsaw, my ultimate introduction (and I might add) my favourite era of Jacksons film making. God I loved having Bravo on cable as a young me lol.

13: Scream 1996
I'm 14 years old slasher flicks are quickly becoming my favourite bread and butter, yet their getting a bit samey, some almost invincible killer gets a body count and gets stopped till the next instalment. No some franchises tried turning this around in their series,s such as Halloween 3 and Ft13th Pt5, but quickly went back  by the next part.
Scream from the amazing Wes Craven turned slasher flicks meta, the killers were human again, the teens were self aware and knew of other slasher flicks which really amped the deaths a lot. I like a lot of people probably seen a lot of me in Randy's character.

12: The Lost Boys 1987
I've complained that some films truly show their age and in that respect don't age well, but there's time where a films age and the time it was filmed in is more like a window, or time capsule. The Lost Boys is one of films, it embodies the 80s from fire lit beach parties with muscular saxophone playing shirtless guys to outstanding performances from the cast of 80s movie staples such as Keifer Sutherland and Cory Feldman.
The stories unique and a lot of the practical effects still hold up well today. Cry little sister.....

11:  Return of the Living Dead 1985
Now this one is a thing for me, I know this one is a comedy just like the second one, but this one has more serious and much bleaker tones compared to RotLD2. Why does this matter?
Because between the both of them depending what mood i'm in I sometimes prefer one over the other as the second actually has people surviving and winning in the end compared to everyone getting obliterated in the first, BUT! I do consider the first to be a better film overall, both acting and story wise.

10: Dawn of the Dead 1978
Travesty some people might say that I don't like the OG night more than dawn, well sorry but I do and another thing that will probably make you gasp is because it's black and white. But I do have an explanation, The first one again is bleak, I hate the ending and yes I know why it is the way it is but it just puts me off all that build up for a pop, dead.
Now the colour thing, no matter what way you look at it, this movie is at times waaay too dark and seeing some ofthe zombies sans colour just isn't as scary as seeing a colour zombie, you miss out on green or greying flesh which for me just detracts from the overall effect for me. Not that i'm not thankful for it or we wouldn't have gotten Dawn at all.
Wow this is long one, Dawn on the other hand has a slightly more optimistically bleak ending and the effects and the setting and scope are just hundred fold better than Night. Expected with effects expert Tom Savini working on the film. I think with Dawn you could still see something like that happening these days too.

9: Child's Play 1988
Childs play exercises one of the best keep it hidden till the end moments in horror movie history for me, not only that the Brad douriff voiced chucky, good guys doll is one of the most memorable supernatural killers to me. It's one of the very few franchises to keep dead on track with every subsequent movie being a sequel to the last.
Though each subsequent movie ditched the keep the killer hidden more and more and the comedy ramped up but then so did the killing. Ade Due Dembela, give me the power the power, will be forever etched into my mind.

8: The Invisible Man 2020
Not many movies from recent years make such a big impact on me anymore but I can happily say some do, especially this offering. Liegh Whannell is an amazing craftsman I had seen only his previous work upgrade before this and that wowed the hell out of me, aside from the bleak ending. So I knew this guy could do wonders with a tiny budget and set up such as this.
Everything from the making lead woman seem like she's banana's from living with abuse for too long to the lingering shots of empty spaces that make you wonder if someone is there watching her. Then there's the horribly graphic scene in the restaurant that only an invisible person could pull off. This should be one to go down into some future hall of fame, like people 2050 watch this and are wowed still.

7: Halloween 1978
Yes the OG original one is probably one of the few franchises where I like the first movie in the series best. The score, the build up the kills it all comes to a head with an amazing ending. Brilliant acting from veteran actor Donald Pleasance as Dr Loomis. Such an unfortunate turn of events that after Halloween 2 this series just kept on getting worse and worse.
Well till we got the 'almost' amazing 2018 wedge in reboot/sequel that course corrected the series, now lets see where they go with the two parts, that have been delayed because of Covid till this october now.

6: Fright Night 1985
My favourite vampire film, I'm not a massive fan of vampire films on the whole but this film is to me at least pretty much flawless. Everything from Roddy McDowells disbelieving Peter Vincent to Chris Sarandons perfect portrayal of a terrifyingly seductive vampire.
This film boast one of the strongest scenes in any vampire movie I have ever seen. Where Jerry dances with Charlies girlfriend and you can see SHE IS TERRIFIED but also totally under his control. All Charlie can do is look on powerless as it all happens too. Absolute move gold!

5: Nightmare on Elm Street 3 1987
Okay, okay I know it's not part 1 but here let me explain, I DID see part 1 first, when I was like 7 or 8, great parents right? But I wasn't a fan of then and kind of avoided it till about 13 when I decided to watch part 3 (good god I'm glad I didn't watch part 2 or I might never of tried it again) I was blown away, as it's more of a direct sequel to part 1 as well it gave me a new love for the series and I actually appreciated part 1 a lot more because of that.
So that's why part 3 is this high it's the one that got into the series as a whole.

4: Evil Dead 2 1987
I know, another sequel before the original, but this is my reasoning. I love evil dead, it's a great movie and you can appreciate it as is. Evil Dead 2 however takes the first movie condenses it then expands on it adding so much more to the mythos of the series. It sets up the next movie superbly and you can tell Bruce Campbell was just let off his leash in this one. From the giggling house props to the chainsaw hand everything in 2 is iconic an much more memorable, Groovy!

3: Friday the 13th Part 6 1986
The first Friday film I ever watched and my favourite slasher franchise too. What a place to start, this is nearly everyone's favourite part or at least in their top 3. From the odd James Bondesque opening scene with a banging Alice Cooper song for a marked return to it being Jason and now in his powered up zombie persona.
Featuring some of the coolest kills such as folding a guy in half and the last show of series hero Tommy Jarvis, played by the awesome Thom Mathews. I may be jaded as it's the first one I saw, but as with nightmare on Elm street A later addition is my favourite.

2: Alien 1979
Numerous reasons for loving this one and still waaaaay holds up well vs the test of time despite the computer systems looking older than my old commodore 64. It's the way you'd think space truckers would still do things in that time despite it being so far in the future.
We see the gradual growth of one Ellen Ripley from a second in command who no one really respects into a bona fide hero and survivor. This is the RIGHT way to do female heroism and shows that even back in the late 70s not everyone was thinking women couldn't be heroic. The creature is scary and can magically materialize from vents and walls to get you.
You don't need big machine guns, rippling muscles or be a man, just be someone with your wits about you and stand firm to your beliefs.

1: The Thing 1982
I don't think this will surprise anyone, considering my number 2. I loved it as a kid just for the bizarre nature of it all overwhelming my little mind. To now as an adult where I understand every little nuance from shadows on the walls to the paranoia of being isolated with a creature that can mimic anyone you know. It's effects still stand the test of time, it's story is timeless, you can imagine this happening in almost any time period and having the phones, satellite links, internet links all sabotaged leaving you in the same predicament as these men find themselves


Honorary Mentions:

Stalled:
I really love this low budget (almost) one set piece film it's like at 21st place but can easily move up in my ratings especially if I've watched it recently. The story has a surprising heartfelt twist that really throws you through a loop too.

CHUD 2, Bud the CHUD:
This can sometimes take the spot of RotLD amazing performances and comedy by the lead CHUD actor too. Almost invincible zombies just like RotLD too.

That's my list like I said changes from time to time but most of those movies are my favourites, now don't forget that's just 20 movies i've seen so many over my lifetime that even films in say spot 200 or beyond are still what I would regard as a good film, these are just the ones that have stood out to me.

Sunday 14 March 2021

THN's Top 5 Haunted places: England

We come to the main part of the country now, I could split this up into areas like some of the others but I'm sure that would just take too long. Instead i'll select a few scary or spooky places from the lists around the middle of the country.
This will allow me me to just come back and do multiple entries on just England now, this will be the format I'll go with unless I decide to do more focused areas such as Orkney, Isle of White or even Jersey, or in Ireland's case it will still be split into Northern and Southern.

So, Spooky places in England, just like the rest of the UK the mainland is steeped in history, a lot of old buildings and areas surviving until this day and age, either renovated or left dilapidated but protected by status. Here THN takes a look at FIVE of the most scary places you could see, stay at or visit in England starting with:


1. Pluckley Village in Kent


Yeah that's right A WHOLE DAMNED VILLAGE, this places as an extreme plethora of ghostly and ghastly goings on. From haunted buildings to ghostly sightings in nearly every area.

One such ghost is the Watercress Lady, an elderly lady who sit on Pinnock bridge apparently smoking pipe, unsurprisingly she's known for her name due to picking the plant and selling it to the villagers.
She was said to have fallen asleep while smoking her pipe and it dropped upon her setting her ablaze which she died from.

There's also the Church of St Nicholas, which is said to be haunted, a group of people waaaaaaay back in the 1970's did an overnight there and were disappointed that all they caught was the vicars dog coming to see them. That would be when the vicar told them he didn't own a dog.


2. Pendle Hill, Lancashire


This wouldn't be a list of English places if it didn't include Pendle Hill, it's one of the most widely known places even outside of the UK. Mainly due to it's horrific witch trials and killing of 12 'Witches' back in the 1600s for the death of 10 people. !0 of them were found guilty, subsequently executed and buried there. Their restless spirits are now said to haunt the place they were buried.

Some genuinely scary stories from some people who've stayed there or just visited include a lot of them saying it feels like invisible hands were around their throats.

Before Covid-19 many ghost walks or overnight stays were available in Pendle Hill, lets hope this starts up again in 2021 when we are vaccinated.


3. The Ancient Ram Inn, Gloucestershire


One of the oldest buildings still in use, built in 1145 the building is used for tours and can even be rented for overnight stays!

It is said to built on two ley-lines which directly draw energy from stone henge, which attracts spirits and also traps them there. This makes this one of the most haunted buildings in ALL of England.
One of the most famous ghosts is of a woman, who hid there from witch hunts in the 1500's though she was caught eventually. Her spirit has been felt there by people, in fact she has her own room.

The house has been shown on a LOT of  ghost TV shows such as, Most Haunted, Ghost Adventures. Theres the Vicar and also children too, so if your looking for a (supposedly) spooky night this might be one for you.


4. Samlesbury Hall, Lancashire


Another one from Lancs, and another 'most haunted house' also home to one of the most typical ghosts a white lady. This lovely stately home has root back to the 14th century, it has some picturesque white and black fronting to the building too.

The difference between this white lady and many others is that she is named, so many in other areas are only guessed at or are totally unknown. One Dorothy Southworth, a former resident of the halls, her story is tragic. She had to meet her lover in secret due him being of a different religion, He was ambushed and killed one night then Dorothy was sent to a convent. Despite this convent being in a different country, it's said Dorothy returned to mourn in her own halls.

A tour of Samlesbury is free, or at least was before Covid hit, hopefully they start up again soon, it's closed on Saturdays, which is an odd day to be shut!


5. Buckland Abby, Devon


Originally a monastery from before King Henry the VIII, the king disbanded it in his rule, then in 1581 it was bought by Sir Francis Drake after his 'travel around the 'then known' world.

Drake was well known for supposedly diddling with the Devil, allowing him to perform some of his amazing feats. Winning wars, returning from travels to distant lands and most spookily for Buckland it's apparent renovation that only took 3 days.
The place is now open and people claim to see Drake himself walking the halls, trapped there in the daytime but able to ride the moors in a black coach drawn by a headless horseman in the nights. Finally one of the more interesting things on offer here is the drum of Drake.
This drum is said to sound in Englands darkest hours, the last time anyone heard it sound was at the beginning of WW1.


Hope you've enjoyed this Top 5 Haunted places edition, we'll going to Jersey next a small island off the bottom of the UK, how scary are the places there?

Stay tuned and see!

Tuesday 2 March 2021

Review: Blood Clots (2018)

 Blood Clots Poster 

Stars: Brooke Smith, Samantha Parry

Budget: Unknown, due to multiple projects

Directed By: Multiple

A seven story anthology with no links to each other, they are just some short films banded together under one title. Each story is a numbered 'clot' They vary in degrees of effects, acting abilities and settings.

The first is a zombie affair with a woman survivor locking herself in a basement when the rooms above get flooded by undead. She, in a very wincingly move, gets some fingers accidentally chopped off and hurt badly by the subsequent fall.

One of the others is a werewolf affair, where a porn film maker introduces a lovely woman to some doggers. Hoping she'll join in and he can then film it. She unfortunately turns into a werewolf killing almost everyone. Leaving the film maker and a few other left alive inside a van...

The worst one of the bunch for me was the incredibly bad CGI giant mutant jellyfish story very incoherent, baaaaaaad CGI and just very silly.

My favourite was Call of Charlie, when a couple preparing a meal for a 'special' guest get interrupted by some friends visiting unexpectedly. The unexpected friends get a bit freaked out when the guest happens to be Charlie, who is basically Cthulhu who the OG couple are offering a sacrifice, i love it that the husband freaks out totally but the other couples son sleepily asks 'uncle' Charlie for a glass of water like this is all normal. Funny, very entertaining made the whole thing worth watching.

This is a short anthology though it's 7 stories they are also very short which is one of the massively glaring problems, most of these are so short that the ideas fall flat or they just seem a bit pointless. Charlie is the most fleshed out of all the films with a decent start middle and finish.

THN awards Blood Clots a 2 out of 5 if anything just watch it for Call of Charlie